Diagnosis: Stupid

Disorder Your Score
Major Depression: Slight-Moderate
Dysthymia: High
Bipolar Disorder: Slight
Cyclothymia: Slight-Moderate
Seasonal Affective Disorder: Very Slight
Postpartum Depression: N/A
Take the Depression Test

According to this quiz, I suffer from Dysthymia, which according to their website is defined as:
“moderate, persistent depression”, which does not inhibit normal activities. And also, “The depression experienced in dysthymia sufferers tends to appear almost as a personality trait. They tend to be self-critical and negative, with low self-esteem. ”

So let’s see. If it doesn’t adversely affect my life functioning, and it just seems like a personality trait…do you think that perhaps it could be a personality trait?!? Nahhh….of course not! Why just accept that not everyone is a happy cheerful idiot when we can invent a disorder instead?

Now, I hate to come off sounding like a Scientologist. I do believe that mental illnesses exist, and should be diagnosed and treated with meds and/or therapy where applicable. Gawds know, there are too many undiagnosed and untreated paranoid-schizophrenics, manic-depressives, and bipolars just in my own family for me to doubt the existence of serious mental ailments.

However, what I am sick of, and what makes me hate the psychiatric professions, is their constant attempts to medicalize/disorder-ize everything and take what are simply normal variations in the spectrum of personality types in the world and turn them into illnesses. It’s like they are trying to create a world where only one personality type is allowed to exist! If you are not continually happy, optimistic, extroverted, and full of self-esteem….you have “Dysthymic disorder.” Quick, gotta get those freaks on meds to make them shiny happy people like the rest of us normals! Bratty kids with bad parents can’t exist anymore, nope….they have ADD/ODD! Dont’ spank them, drug ‘em up! If you lack social skills and are smart enough that you make normal dumb humans uncomfortable…..suddenly you’re on the “Asperger’s spectrum”! You’re too smart…we don’t like you…seek help…maybe try watching more TV! And of course, if you have a baby and wake up one morning and realize that your child has made your life a living hell….that CAN’T possibly be a sane, logical reaction to the very real facts in front of you…why NO, you have “post-partum depression” because of COURSE raising a baby is the most wunnnerful thing in the world and if you don’t think so, we will drug you until you do!

You see what I’m getting at here? I think there’s a vast pharmacological conspiracy that will not rest until every American is a lemming-like uncritical extrovert of barely average intelligence. Probably because that type makes the best workers for our corporate overlords. Oops, I’m mistrustful and prone to conspiracy theories! What’s the disorder name for that??

One Response to “Diagnosis: Stupid”

  1. Cath Says:

    I completely agree with you re. diagnosing “mental disorders”, particularly from my personal experience. I still took the test though ;-)

    Great blog :-)

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